The Right Rev Rowland

I have been performing marriages in Nevada for nine years, and have worked for eleven separate wedding companies or chapels. The wedding business has been a God-send for me and my family as our church plants have each been small, independent works that don’t come with much outside funding for salaries and healthcare and all that ‘I gotta support my family’ stuff. Weddings have helped to offset our deficits.

In the last week, two bizarre incidents have occurred that have topped the weirdness list for my short career in Vegas weddings. The first is shared here, I will follow up with the other in a later post. Others may follow as I feel moved. I was at a smaller chapel on the south end of the strip where I was waiting for the couple to check in so we could begin our ceremony.

While waiting for all the necessary paperwork to be done and flowers administered, I heard a commotion in the office area. A ‘gentleman’ was shouting at the top of his lungs at one of our receptionists, which I found odd, as she is one of the most soft-spoken people I have ever met. His main complaint, made repeatedly and loudly was that he was not allowed to take any photos of his friend (the bride) on her wedding day. His efforts to shout down this poor young lady trying to explain the chapel’s policy were asinine and disingenuous. He could take photos from his seat during the ceremony or out on the chapel grounds, just not in restricted areas. (like dressing rooms)

Each chapel is an independent business that sells chapel time, flowers, photo and video services. All of them have their own policies  regarding the use of outside florists, ministers, photographers, or-yes- even Elvises. (or is it Elvisi?) This particular chapel wouldn’t allow photos in the bridal changing room or offices. They also don’t allow people to roam around during the ceremony, stand on the pews, or crawl on the steps in front of the minister to get that paparazzi shot with their cardboard kodak disposable camera. (yes, people actually try that)

OK, rabbit trail here: WHY do people with a camera in their hands think that they are invisible during a wedding ceremony? Something about their cellphone, cam-corder, plastic disposable or multi-mega-pixel 3x zoom cool digital makes them think that THEY are ordained BY GOD to get that one shot that captures the spirit of the whole wedding. What they do is distract the minister, who has no idea how far these ‘photographers’ will go and has to keep one eye on the couple and the other on Johnny Digital. (Like when the groomsmen standing next to the groom whip out their cell phones and start taking pictures of each other!)

These same guest/photo-bug geniuses are indignant when I have to tell them to go take a seat as they are not in the wedding party and they are killing the moment with the ‘raack, raaack, raaack!’ of their disposable cardboard camera. This all makes for a fantastic wedding video with these morons creeping around behind the couple and in the aisle to get the perfect shot. Classy.

But back to my main point. Wedding chapels sell services to make money. Part of what they sell is photography. When restrictions are placed on photography, it is because every snap of a photo by Aunt Harriet or Cousin George is a competing shot with the photography that the chapel sells. Family members have even told couples, ‘Oh, you don’t need to buy those, I have all those pictures, I was shooting over his shoulder when he was posing you.’ Which is why there are no cameras or guests allowed in the photo shoot. Every wedding package includes photography, and you always take more poses than the couple purchased to see if they want to purchase more of their photos. It’s called b-u-s-i-n-e-s-s and it’s what makes our economy work. At least it used to.

If the couple opts for a ‘chapel only’ package, without flowers or photos, then there are no photos allowed, as that would be giving away for free what the bride and groom didn’t want to buy. No business that does that will stay in business for long.

Some other chapels don’t even allow photos by the guests AT ALL in any ceremony! So this loud, indignant jerk who claimed to be the bride’s ‘business partner’ and ‘with the media’ was making an ass of himself by yelling over and shouting down our receptionist who was just doing her job.

His favorite line: “I can’t believe in this economy that you would want negative press.” I had to wonder if the biggest jerk in the room would portray himself as the idiot he was. When asked his name and which media he was a part of, he rattled off several networks and stormed out yelling, “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it!” He then sat as quiet as a mouse through the rest of the wedding events. We never heard from him or about him again.

The impact he made on the chapel, that day however, was striking. All the guests heard him, all the staff heard him. Guests from other weddings who were arriving and gathering heard and saw the commotion. His arrogance and attempt to intimidate using ‘bad press’ as a club was insulting. There is a reason why people hate the media, the dishonesty and the brashness they operate in. The attitude that says, ‘I can go where others can’t and do what others cannot do, because I’m with the press!’ is the height of arrogance. And the temper-tantrums they throw when they are thwarted is just as childish as the rest of their demeanor.

So when the media won’t cover the teaparties or attempts to marginalize regular people who are fed up with them and the government that acts in the same arrogant fashion, it only proves what we don’t like about them. And shows why they need to be told to grow up and start treating others with respect. Anyone who comes in with the attitude that because they are who they are they should get what others should not needs to be brought back down to earth. Hard. Painfully. So that the rest of us can live in peace.

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